Last night was a new moon; it created some doom-scenario’s in my dream;
yet this morning, strangely enough; it felt like I was re-set.
Upon waking I finished the movie “Under the Tuscan Sun’.
It re-minded me of some childhood and holiday fun.
Lately I’ve been getting many signs about Italy.
I’m not sure how to interpret them for me…
We will see, where this post is gonna lead me and thee.
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Since a few weeks; it’s been coming up in surges and as fast as it came; it went away.
How can I say;
what I mean?
I’m living a life; very sober, alone and at times lonely.
Yet for what I was going through it suited me.
But this morning more than ever; I want to enjoy abundantly all that is created in the forever.
I want to live live live!
Even though I have been doing this and have been content with the way it is;
My heart is yearning for the following bliss:
Outside festive, abundant, musical, fun and filled with laughter dinner parties with my closest friends;
Catering we would not rent;
we’d make all the food ourselves;
guests can bring someone else;
candles everywhere in the garden.
There are no rules, except to come as you are.
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Ofcourse this movie has life-secrets in them too.
But they are not ’deliberate’, like the other movies do.
It wasn’t created like Disney used to;
for what he knew;
has been kept away from me and you;
for ages.
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For thirty one years, I wasn’t in control over my life.
But then I woke-up; I made the outer influences stop;
being in control over my life.
I feel free, but at times also very lonely.
Just like the lady in the movie;
after her divorce.
Ofcourse; my journey was also initiated by an, almost deadly, break-up;
but what I didn’t know then;
that it was the beginning of the end for me;
to see;
we are living an illusion.
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Now that I’m awake within the dream and at times, sure.. I am a bit lonely;
I want to break free;
into a new life for me.
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Life isn’t meant, to spend alone.
Even though I am home;
in my being, my heart is healed, all the layers of the onion are peeled;
off;
the outcome can be none other than that this story has got to come to a stop.
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Through ascension I’ve come to experience that I am not in charge.
It’s my higher Self; who’s been the perfect director and inspector of my life.
Now that my veil has lifted and my higher Self has completely sifted;
and sunk into me;
we’ve become one and together we are free;
to do, be and be-come;
who-ever we want to be.
The energy;
knows my heart.
Life is not hard; I don’t need to ‘do’ anything;
for a no-thing, to be-come a thing.
Manifesting?
The real secret; is to live your life, according to your heart.
Now contains All There Is.
I sit in my bliss; see all the possibilities for me.
To set them free; in physicality;
there is nowhere I need be, but where my heart and intuition lead me.
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Faith, and I’ve said it before; isn’t blind; it’s visionary.
Because I trust, without it being a must; (wordcount: 555)
I know my life; is about to change in ways;
without me counting the days;
that I am not allowed to see.
But because the vision that was given to me;
led me to this town;
I know I’m exactly where I need be.
And you know?!
All is perfect; it always is.
As long as we don’t forget; that even the imperfect situations;
are only there to re-mind us;
in the end is always a new beginning!
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Want to know the end of the movie?
Go see it for yourself;
then you’ll know whether she, again, found happiness with someone else.
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One more thing; there was one thing in the movie that stood out for me;
I too, had Polish people work on my house.
I left ‘my’ house without it being completely done;
I wanted a ‘new’ sun.
In 2006 I left for Canada; I know I am not meant to live in Holland.
But here I am in ‘no-mans land’;
no longer a citizen in my birth-country and an ‘illegal’ here in Canada.
In this no-space that I’m in;
that is where endless possibilities begin!